A letter to Lesley Garner, shes kinda like the dear Abby of the UK.
She hears from a woman who says that 54 years after her parents’ divorce she is still coming to terms with it.
Dear Lesley,
I read your column about the effects of divorce on children with interest as I am still trying to come to terms with my parents’ divorce, 54 years ago. I’ve recently spent time with my 92-year-old father whom I hadn’t seen for 25 years, and before that, for nearly 30. Following the divorce, Dad moved to Canada to start a new life and we heard little from him.
He bought a computer for his 90th birthday and we began emailing, which is how we came to meet again. The two weeks we have just shared were very special. I felt a mixture of great happiness, because we got on so well, and sadness because I have missed so much.
When a marriage goes wrong, everything that follows is damage limitation
A child feels rejected by the parent leaving, and even worse if contact is lost. It affects all future relationships as it is difficult to trust and accept love from the opposite sex. I am still gathering my thoughts and feelings together after our reunion but my main message to parents would be talk, talk and never stop talking. Don’t ever presume that your children have “got over it”.
Janet
Splitntwo is an organization the helps non-custodial parents have more time with their children. They educate parents on parental alienation and the devasting effects it has on kids that are denied a relationship with a mother or father. I am proud to be a board member of this org for a great cause. Check them out at www.splitntwo.com
